Doubting Thomas 

   “You have come to believe because you have seen me.  Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to  believe.” (John 29: 20) 

   Today’s gospel included the story of “doubting” Thomas, the apostle who refused to believe Jesus had risen unless he could put his finger in the holes of His hands and his hand into the wound on Jesus’ side.

   In my opinion Thomas gets a bad rap by the moniker “Doubting Thomas".  I think we would all have to add “doubting” to our name if wondering, questioning, and yes, even doubting was applied to us as it has been to Thomas.

   Certainly, there have been times when I questioned God’s will in my life, wondered why things had happened as they had.  At times I have even doubted the purpose and correctness of His decisions.  So I suppose I should be referred to as “doubting” Ed.  And yet, I think there is some benefit and growth that comes from some questioning and doubt.

   When I have found myself wondering about God’s decisions and plans for my life it has encouraged me to sit down and think about why I was wondering or doubting.  It urged me to prayer, asking God “why” and I don’t believe He was offended by that.  My faith and trust grew through these experiences.

   The bottom line for me is quite simple, He is God, and I am not.  Though I may sometimes wonder and question I have complete confidence in His will for my life, even when I can’t understand His purpose.  I trust that His purpose is always to help me grow in faith and love and to lead me home to Him.  That’s a good enough answer for me.  “I do believe.  Help my unbelief.” (Mark 9: 24).