Weakness 

   “What I do, I do not understand.  For I do not do what I want, but I do what I hate.” (Romans 7: 15) 

   Sometimes it seems I’m doing pretty good in living my life for God; that I’m serving Him well.  Then I find myself binge watching some stupid television series that contributes nothing of God to my day.  My weakness arises again.

   I believe that when I get a bit prideful, thinking how well my spiritual life is going because of my efforts the Lord shows me that it is all because of His spirit within me that I can do any good at all.  I don’t think He withdraws from me, just gives me enough rope to tie myself up in knots.

   I should know better by now; this is not a new occurrence.  Each time it happens I promise to do better and apologize to God for my weakness, asking for Him to strengthen me.  But I must accept the strength He offers, not expect Him to force it upon me.  It requires action on my part; acknowledging my weaknesses and focusing on dealing with them with His help.

   I have no doubt that these ups and downs will continue.  My prayer is that I can recognize the weaknesses sooner, turn to God more quickly and use the strength He brings to overcome them.