A Sinful Man 

   “But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even look up to heaven, but was beating his breast and saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’” (Luke 18: 13) 

   I am no better than the tax collector; I am a sinful man.  I don’t want to be, I desire to be sinless, but that is not possible for a fallen man.  It shames me, it hurts me that I am unable to avoid sin because I never want to offend my Lord.

   St. Paul writes, “For I do not do the good that I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do.  Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it but sin that dwells within me.” (Romans 7: 19 – 20).  I cannot avoid sin even though I would wish to do so.  There is a helplessness within me that causes me to succumb to the temptations of the evil one.  And yet I believe that my sincere desire to never sin again pleases the Lord even though I cannot fulfill that desire.

   When I consider the sad state of my humanity, the fact that I am unable to avoid sin it makes me even more aware of the love of God.  What love it took for Him to send His only Son to die for my sins.  What love it took for Jesus to submit himself to rejection, abandonment, suffering and crucifixion to pay the price for my sins.  He loves me so much that he would accept the punishment due me.

   I can’t always do what God would have me do but still He does not condemn but offers redemption and salvation.  I am unable to serve Him as I should and as I desire, but He accounts me worthy of His love and mercy.  In humility and sorrow for my shortcomings I turn to Him and He calls me home. 

Father, I am so far from perfection.

Not a day passes without sin.

Yet You love me and forgive me.

Help me to better love and serve You. 

Amen