Loneliness 

   Have you ever felt alone even though you were in a crowd of people?  Is loneliness a reality or a state of mind?

   I have lived alone for over two years since the passing of my wife.  At first I wondered how I could carry on alone, without her.  I used to pray that God would take me too so that we could be reunited but I finally realized that such prayers were offensive; God gave me this life, He gave me many wonderful years with my wife.  To ask Him to take it seemed to me to be an insult.

   With support from family and friends the pain began to ebb.  I know now that it will never be completely gone, it is a part of my life, but it no longer overwhelms me as it did.  I give a lot of credit to my pastor who counseled me extensively and brought me great peace in so many ways.  I asked him once how I was to know what God wanted of me now.  He replied, “Perhaps for now all He wants is for you to endure.”  I’ve gone back to those words so many times and have drawn great comfort from them.

   I still live alone but I’ve grown to accept it; it no longer weighs upon me.  In fact, I have found that I am never truly alone, God is with me always.  I’ve come to believe that perhaps this is what God wants of me now; to live my life for Him and with Him in this world while I wait to join Him in the next.

   There are still times when the sorrow and pain engulf me and I suppose those times will continue, but my Lord is always with me.  He helps me, He strengthens me and gives me peace.  With His love I can endure. 

You sometimes give us great challenges.

Mountains that we must climb.

But I know that You are always with me.

With You I can climb those mountains. 

Amen